Of Books, Chest Pain, & Death

Back to school. My books and I are reunited once gain. I miss them and I know they miss me too especially the intimate moments we shared together in the wee hours of the morning with them opened and yours truly sleeping. Ha ha ha... But now, we have plenty of time again for bonding and ummm... sleeping together? lol!

Ok, let's put aside books as of the moment because I am eager right now to talk about the pain (as in literal pain!) I am experiencing in my left chest which sometimes radiates to my left arm. I want to talk about it because I am deeply troubled. You see this pain in my chest started to occur in coincidence with the discussion of our topic in Nursing Care Management regarding cardiovascular diseases and their management. It made me frantic! Could this be angina pectoris, myocardial infarction, or much worst than that!

I've tried to listen to the sounds of my heart with my stethoscope and since I am not yet an expert in distinguishing normal from abnormal sounds, the swishing, thumping, murmuring, gushing, or whatever made me even more paranoid! Oh my God, I am too young to die, I told myself.

Dying, why are most people afraid of it? Even I have a foreboding feeling about it sometimes although me and my classmates sometimes made a joke about it. Maybe it is just the fact that we don't know what happens next after dying. No one returns from the grave after a year of being dead and told us what is it like on the after life. I guess this where the role of the Bible enters. It gives us insights and hope about new life after death. Now I don't care if other people doesn't believe in what the Bible is saying especially on the aspect of life after death. As long that it gives me something to hold on to when my time has come to lie on the death bed, a promise to look forward to when my mortal body starts to give up, that's only thing that matters to me most. It is because it erases my fear of death and thus gives me the inspiration to live life to the fullest.

Wow, I just realized that this entry has jumped from one topic to another! From books, to chest pain, to death. Talking about random thoughts from my gray matter!